most memorable misuse of the queen's english.

Click and view the enlarged image in a new tab.

If anyone can make sense of the alliterative statement made by the nameless wonder, kindly enlighten us all. Note the name of the site from which this pic has been taken al-rashid.com (as is visible on the pic). It amazes me how every incorrect use of the English language has some or the other Islamic connection.


NOTE: This is a joke. I am not communal, just awesome.

Californication.

Not the song, no. The show.

No, let me do this right, with the capitalization.

Not, the song, no. THE show. It was created by Tom Kapinos.



What is it about? It is about Hank Moody (David Duchovny). A rebel in the world of literature. His radical thoughts were made famous by his one and only big hit, 'God Hates Us All' (he had me there).

This guy is a stud. He is awesome in the sack with the ladies (they all are). What is awesome about this serious is that they actually show the boobs of the girls he fucks. And he fucks the best of them! (read Mia, look here) Moving on (as difficult as it may be), other than the boobs and the ass, and the very freaky bald dude (Hank's agent and friend) who has a threesome with his wife and his secretary who is a gothic chick, which ignites lesbian curiosity in his wife leading to temporary seperation, it also shows Hank fuck a black man's white wife! (GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS AND THEIR ASS AND THEIR BOOBS, AND WRITE SOMETHING ASEXUAL!! *point noted*)

They ALSO show his emotional side. His constant battle with the most boring guy ever (he even beats me), Bill, who is the father of Mia and Karen's new 'love', aptly described as a 'dial tone', leaves you pitying Hank and wondering yet again, what girls really want. But you can't pity him for long 'cause in the next frame he'll invariably be back in the sack and the boobs bounce around and it becomes so difficult to think of anything else. Just the boobs and you, and nothing else.. (STOP! *point noted*)

So yes, he is emotional. He is also vulnerable and that makes the whole show amazing. Unlike the other shows I've seen, this one does NOT trigger an irrationally long period of self pity, self loathing and a general sense of despair for never getting to first base. Hank's shit is so fucked up that you forget about your own junk and just want to see him and Karen getting back together.

The parts where his 12 year old daughter 'Becca' and he have conversations with her sharing her problems with him deserve a special mention. The to be goth rocker's liberal use of the words 'fuck' and 'asshole' (sometimes used to describe her father) don't seem out of place at all.

The show is a complete package. All the other series look like The Teletubbies now.

I have stayed up till 6a.m. on three separate nights watching Californication. And then dreamt of fornication for the next 8 hours. But the only fornication that ever seems like for me is Kaali-fornication. Sigh. I'm willing to settle, any takers?






NOTE: This post is dedicated to Elsa Joy who commented on my 'i will be back'. Thank you.

i will be back.

i will be back soon, now that it's over.

my valentine.

it's valentine's day. today is the day for young lovers, or so i've heard. today, two people who love each other (or two people pretending to love each other so that they don't feel lonely and can get some action in the sack) put in considerable effort to tell their partner that they love them.

i can see people waking around looking. some looking at that lovely person by their side. some looking with hazy eyes at the happy looking people, thinking about old times. some just staring and being obscene. then there's me. i'm looking too. but this time, for the first time in my life, i'm not one of those people. i was never the first kind, never the second, always the third. but today i'm looking at the sky.

the thoughts in my mind surprise me. i feel a sinking feeling in my stomach. but this isn't the annual "valentine's day... good for you archie's. sigh...", its different. i want to be with my valentine. the person i love more than anyone else in the whole world. i want to hug her, kiss her. i want to rest my head in her lap and slowly fall asleep there.

it's 10am. she's probably reading the paper right now. having breakfast. having her cornflake-biscuit pudding. in half an hour, she'll probably be watching tv and within 10 minutes she'll be nodding off. then she'll wake up suddenly, carelessly brush aside the things on the bed, curl up into a ball and take her 5 minute nap. at this point i would give her a kiss on her cheek. i wish i could.

i miss you mom.

happy valentine's day.

daily life, daily pictures.

Crude, but effective.











All you can do is hope its not winter!












For me and my kind, "It's over man. Stop running and stop drooling. Just stop."









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NOTE:

These pictures were taken from a friend's facebook profile.

Thanks Sallu.

never again.

"this is madness."
"this is too much."
"this is weird."
"this is too much trouble."
"i'm never doing it again."
"this causes too much pain."
"this has messed up my life."
"this is the worst time in my life."

yet, he still does. we all do. if we don't, we sure wish we could.

we'll never understand this. i don't think we're supposed to understand, we are just supposed to do. and we do, do.

true story.

once upon a time there was a boy. he was 6 feet tall and considered himself a man. however, to the world, he was still a boy who had his habits. some good, some bad. one day, in the freezing cold, he decided that he needs to change. maybe it was the cold that gave him the crazy idea, maybe not. we'll never know. fuelled by his recent phase of unparalleled happiness, he made the tough decision.

with determination in every step, he went to his friend and asked him to lend him something that his friend hadn't used in a long time just like so many others around him. but this man-boy wanted be different.

he went to his own place of residence, and gathered the stuff he needed.

he reaches his destination. along the way many people look at him in amazement. respect visible in their eyes. some whispered that he wouldn't make it. but he did. he didn't turn and run.

once there, he took his place, hung his belongings. then with his friend's possession in his right hand, along with his own in the left he walked to the provider.

his worst fear had come true. not warm.. not warm.. the words echo in his head like a scream that wakes one up from a nightmare. he can't think for a moment. but soon, with all his strength he forces his trained mind to accept the fact that there would be no warmth to make his task easier.

he walks back to his belongings, secures his surroundings. takes his clothes off. he hesitates a little. then takes in one last breath of air...

and pours a mug full of cold water on his head. his insides scream for some warmth. but he has a bath. dries himself up. and goes back to his room. clean and proud.

true story.